The Grief You Don’t See

I still remember her calling me and my siblings bundle and the shaking of her bracelets when she hugged me, i remember waving goodbye from the back window of the car while she stood by her door waving back, she wouldnt stop waving till the car went round the corner, i remember going to her house for christmas and having her amazing cooking, i will never forgive leukemia. She was the most amazing nan in the world, i now understand that she wanted to stop hurting, she was grieving the loss of her loved one too and now i know how she felt. I remember my 1st grandad getting that call saying my nan was struggling to breathe, 5 minutes later another call saying she had passed away. I sat in the living room completely silent, not crying, trying to figure out in my mind what just happened, then i walked upstairs, sat on my bed and I just started bawling my eyes out. I hate going to school acting normal, i hate being the one who has to keep quiet about it. People may think im too young to care but what they dont realize is that, I too have memories with her, i also loved her, and i also lost her. If you're going through even a tiny bit of grief, you are not alone at all. Your sadness is valid.